Preorder Nintendo Wii

15 June, 2006

Wanna Buy Wii

I've launched a new blog I thought someone would care about.

Buy Wii Nintendo Info Blog

The site focuses on the next generation console Wii, wii games, wii hardware, wii accessories, and of course where to preorder wii.

So, if your looking for any information on the Nintendo Wii, stop by and check it out. Also, you will notice that I have a feed burner chicklet thats just begging to be clicked and subscribed to. If you do subscribe, please let me know about it. I'd be happy to mention your site in my blog.

12 January, 2006

Uber Loving Urban Dictionary

I uber love the urban dictionary and I've taken it upon myself to submit words I feel need to be added to this plethora of web knowledge. I will be posting my submissions here on this blog, along with updates on whether or not they were accepted. Your support in this process is extremely appreciated. Let's start, the following was my first submission to The Urban Dictionary, submitted today at 3:00pm.

Those of you familiar with Urban Dictionary know that there is a format to follow, very similar to the format found in a traditional dictionary. First the defined word will be listed, followed by the definition, and finally a brief sentence using the word in question.

scat attack

The flinging of ones feces upon the face and chest of their intimate partner. This can typically be followed by a cleveland steamer.

During the "good sex", Joeseph pulled a scat attack on Suzy, covering her in brown goo.

Well, that's all for today, check back often to see what I've been adding to the Urban Dictionary and please leave any comments on my words here. I will keep everyone posted as to whether or not Urban Dictionary accepts my word or not, keep your fingers crossed. :)


03 January, 2006

I Started an Image Hosting Site

Well, sort of. I have installed an image hosting script that allows my friends to upload images to my server and link to them on their blog/forum and/or another site. I would encourage anyone interested to stop by and sign up. It is not immediate activation though, I will need to authorize you to do any once signed up give me a lil while to verify you. :)

Sign up HERE

Let me know what you guys think, if it's worthwhile...or just stupid. This site will allow you to generate html and bb codes so that you can easily cut 'n paste directly into your site or forum. If anyone has any questions at all feel free to contact me via email or by leaving a comment here.


30 December, 2005

Uncanny Ability

You may not believe me, but I have the uncanny and unfaultering ability to know when someone else is in the restroom. My company is located inside of a much larger warehouse, where different companies rent storage space. Keep in mind that there are still only 20-30 people in the building at any given time, yet I know when one of them is in the restroom.

It doesn't matter if it's morning, noon, or closing time, if I have to go to the restroom, there's always someone in there. They're doing their business and dropping the kids off at the pool, while I'm trying to sneak a lil weasal leak. In addition, I would have to rank that as one of the top 10 most uncomfortable situations...ever! I place it right below getting caught with your jimmajamma in your pounding hand.

Nevertheless, my ability has allowed me to put many individuals through uncomfortable situations. Despite my best efforts, this gift will not go away and I'm destined to always put people in this unbearable situation. Therefore, if you ever manage to visit me at work...pray your colon doesn't deside to go on break.


29 December, 2005

Owning the Internet

With so much talk flying around lately about monitoring the internet and putting more regulations on it...I've decided who better to own it...than myself. While the countries and UN are arguing over who's going to govern the WWW, I'll go ahead and purchase it. Phase one of my assuming ownership is complete, Al Gore and I have settled on a selling price, it's just a matter of moving funds around.

In the mean time, I've been filling my wanton time schedule by referbushing my Press Release site, The Tounge. The move to keep it online was one of intrigue about a new site code, Joomla! Its simply a marvelous site backbone and I would personally recommend it to anyone looking to start such a site. In addition, I've changed the layout of my actual blog, Nails Blog, to look more bloggish. The site should be much easier to follow and read now as opposed to dealing with the hassle of iFrames. Not to mention, it's much, much, much easier to update!

Well, that's all for now and I'll keep everyone posted on when I assume ownership of the internet.


28 December, 2005

New Year Resolutions, T0P 1O

Boy oh boy, the new year is quickly coming up on us...or over us..? At any rate I thought this would be a good time to make a list of resolutions. But, first I think we need a little history about New Year's Resolutions...

The tradition of the New Year's Resolutions goes all the way back to 153 B.C. Janus, a mythical king of early Rome was placed at the head of the calendar. With two faces, Janus could look back on past events and forward to the future. Janus became the ancient symbol for resolutions and many Romans looked for forgiveness from their enemies and also exchanged gifts before the beginning of each year. What a bunch of Roman saps.... Anyways, on to the resolutions.

10. Finally get around to cleaning out my belly button...and taint.
9. Grow a mustache.
8. Get married.
7. Punch a retard in the face.
6. Learn to control my anger.
5. Watch all of Shawn Michaels Pr0n.
4. Learn to 5p311 w1th numb3r5.
3. Steal a homeless persons blanket.
2. Learn to be more accepting of the lazy.

and finally, my number 1 new years resolution for 2006 is:

1. Take multiple perfect dumps so that I never have to wipe when I'm done.

Thanks for your time and I hope everyone else has started thinking about their resolutions for the upcoming and fresh year.


23 December, 2005

I Heart Mustache!

You may not realize it, but those who wear mustache's fall into 1 of 3 categories.

+ man/woman over 50
+ Child Molestor
+ Member of the Village People

Keep in mind this is not just my opinion, but an observation that I've made based on years of research. I've studied the mustache from it's humble beginnings, typically worn by military personel, to it's now rampant run on these above listed categories.

Thanks to our friends over at Wikipedia I have this comprehensive list of mustache styles that have graced the faces of many famous individuals. Keep in mind, that they still fall into 1 of the 3 categories above and in some cases, more than one.

  • * Dali - Narrow, long points bent or curved steeply upward; areas past the corner of the mouth must be shaved. Artificial styling aids permitted.
  • * English - Narrow, beginning at the middle of the upper lip the whiskers are very long and pulled to the side, slightly curled; the ends are pointed slightly upward ; areas past the corner of the mouth must be shaved. Artificial styling aids permitted.
  • * Fu Manchu - long, downward pointing ends, generally beyond the chin
  • * Handlebar - bushy, with small upward pointing ends
  • * Imperial - whiskers growing from both the upper lip and cheeks, curled upward (distinct from the royale, or impĂ©riale)
  • * Moustachio or mustachio - large luxuriant moustache, with hair sometimes growing down the sides of the mouth.
  • * Pencil- narrow, closely clipped, outlining the upper lip, with a wide shaven gap between the nose and moustache
  • * Toothbrush - thick, but shaved except for about an inch in the center; associated with Adolf Hitler and Charlie Chaplin.
  • * Trash - thin trashy mustache most famously found on John Waters and Ted Turner
  • * Walrus - bushy, hanging down over the lips, often entirely covering the mouth
So remember, the next time you are choosing a facial hair style, just think, what category will I fit into.

*UPDATE 12/26/05*

As noted by uberhaters group, there should be another category which follows:
"Crustache" Thin gross hair from someone that looks like they have never ever shaved. Mostly seen on 14 year old boys, and Brandon Smith.